


eyes closed and traveling

by justsleepwalkin



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Campaign 2 (Critical Role), Episode Related, Gen, Introspection, Spoilers, c2e117
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-20
Updated: 2020-11-20
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:02:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27640427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justsleepwalkin/pseuds/justsleepwalkin
Summary: The watch passes in silence, the snow dipping down and winding around his horns.
Relationships: Lucien & Mollymauk Tealeaf
Kudos: 51





	eyes closed and traveling

**Author's Note:**

> Not sure I've ever posted something _during_ an episode. 
> 
> Title from [♫](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q-0KRZXG8Yw) Eyes Closed and Traveling by Peter Broderick

“Goodnight, my friend,” Cree says as she curls into her pack, leaving Lucien to take watch. 

The red of the eyes on their party members fade completely and Lucien stares into the magicked fire, tempted to cast one more sweep of the area, expecting to see another scrying beacon. But it seems... unlike his shadow to try such a thing. 

He shakes himself out of it, huddling into the furs of his cloak. 

The watch passes in silence, the snow dipping down and winding around his horns. He loses himself to the cold, reminding him that he's _alive_ , he's whole, he'll never be that shattered _mess_ that masqueraded as an intelligent being ever again. 

He startles when he realizes he stopped staring at the fire, eyes on the twisting four-leaf clover that he had... pulled from his coat? When? Why?

He blinks, the stem suddenly the only thing he can feel as he rolls it between his thumb and forefinger.

Another blink, and he reaches up to rub the back of his hand at an eye, chipping off the frozen tear and cradling it in his palm. He feels his heart rate speed up and he feels _exposed_ , gaze tracking over each party member like they can see this—this—what? Vulnerability? Frayed confidence? 

They can't. He knows they can't. They're not connected right now. He's the only one awake. 

Angrily, he flicks the tear off him. He goes to throw the clover and he stops, arm outstretched, the clover a dark silhouette from the flames backing it. He stares, transfixed. Then, very slowly, he pulls it back in and tucks the clover back into his jacket. 

He clenches his empty hand, nails digging into his palm, and bows his head until he can slow his breathing.

**Author's Note:**

> I had some feelings.


End file.
